Things I forgot about Winter (That are terrible)

Since moving to Chicago in June, I've been trying my hardest to mentally prepare myself for winter, following nearly four years in Florida where weather is an illusion. I came to terms with the fact that I can't just wear skirts, sundresses, t-shirts, and tank tops every day, which was horrible in and of itself because long sleeves and pants are suffocating and terrible. I remembered the importance of a good boot, what it's like to purchase a jacket, and even bought a shovel to clear a path when the snow came. Everything would be fine. I always liked winter in New Jersey, and realistically I could handle it compared to my two roommates who were also coming from Florida.

It wasn't until I was taking a lyft home the other day that I suddenly remembered every little inconvenience about winter that adds up to being perhaps the most frustrating season of the year. After several years not dealing with these small annoyances, I'm realizing I'm less prepared and was blinded by Christmas for the first 18 years of my life in winter. So this is a short list of crappy things that we all forget about winter. Open your eyes, people.

1. Rock salt ruining your shoes and everything you once loved in your life.
• I don't mind salting sidewalks to melt the ice and provide traction, SURE, WHATEVER. I actually prefer it to the 300+ times I've slipped on black ice. But I do hate the sense of urgency involved in taking your shoes off before you scratch the floors of your home. Or how nice your shoes/coat/pants/everything looked before the salt stuck to it and left a cakey layer of dried out patches on you. 
2. Wearing multiple pairs of socks, and all of them are wet. 
• Who are we kidding when we layer up on socks?
3. Going into a department store to get winter clothes, and suddenly realizing you have 30 layers on. 
• It starts when you realize most buildings are heat-controlled, so you're quickly very overheated in the store. As you get more items you think to yourself, "I should probably try these on, because winter clothes are terrible and the sleeves are never long enough." You go into the dressing room and take off your coat, scarf, cardigan, sweater, and undershirt to try on like two things. Then you remember you have to put all those layers back on before you leave the changing room. You weep quietly to yourself, because the process of changing has already left you flushed and adding layers on is, in this moment, your definition of hell.
4. Checking your pocket for your cellphone.
• But, like an idiot, your phone is in the pocket of layer 2 of the five layers you're currently wearing.
5. Being responsible for scarves and hats.
• Okay I think most of my problems with winter have to do with the fact that I'm always too hot in proportion to the suggested number of layers. 
• But putting scarves and hats in overstuffed pockets or the sleeve of your coat still sucks, right? There is a 100% chance that you will lose at least one scarf and one hat this winter, according to science.
6. Gloves as a whole
• Even if they say you can use your phone with them on, you can't. Also you can't feel anything, so your guess is as good as mine whether or not my keys are in my jacket pocket.
7. Grocery stores when it's snowing
• Suddenly everyone prepares for an apocalyptic-level winter, no matter how mild the forecast. Food hoarding for four inches of snow? O-okay buddy.

In conclusion, I think I mostly hate wearing layers. But winter is still my favorite season, because I'm just sick with pollen allergies for the other 3 seasons. 

This guy gets me.